My dear boy,
I did not write you as many letter during your pregnancy... and, in fact, none of them are online. I may go back at some point and fill in the gaps, but I want to tell you about your labor and delivery first, before the memories become to fuzzy and hazy in this newborn stage.
As my third baby, everyone told me, "Labor will be so much faster this time!" I did everything I could to ensure you were in the best position, that my cervix was soft and ready, etc. I ate dates. I ate pineapple. I drank raspberry leaf tea. I rested on my hands and knees, belly down, so you would turn. I did it all.
And yet, labor still didn't start until I was 6 days past my due date.
At about 4:00pm on Thursday, January 24th, contractions started. They were regular... and they were all in my back. Again. I labored through dinner, through the night. They got stronger but were manageable. Daddy had the stack of index cards I'd written out for such a time as this and he faithfully read them and prayed with me through each contraction. (My favorite card? "It feels good to be a gangster.")
I called my midwife at about 3:00am to tell her what was going on and that, Lord willing, we would head in soon! "Maybe you'd be here before noon!" we thought. And then contractions tapered off.
They picked up steam again mid-morning, though! "This is it, we thought! By early afternoon, surely, you'll be here!" And then they stopped again.
At about 4:00pm, with you still not here, we decided to go to the midwife just to see if we'd made any progress. At my last check, I had been about 2cm dilated... but with all that work, surely I was at least 6cm, right?! I waddled into the midwife, where they hooked me up to some monitors to check your heartrate during contractions. Everything was great, except for the back labor being so painful. And when they checked, I was at 4cm.
4 cm, after 24 hours of labor. Not encouraging.
They sent me and daddy home, where I decided to take a bath. I rested in the tub some, letting the warm water sink into my muscles.
And when I got out, things came on fast and furious! Daddy was making dinner, but I just could. not. leave our room. I put on some clothes, stopping often to work through a contraction. Mimi came into our room while daddy cooked and rubbed my back or squeezed my hips while I swayed on my big exercise ball. The movement felt good, but I knew things were getting more and more intense.
And I knew there was no way I could eat dinner with everyone else.
Daddy and Mimi got Ruth and Clara into bed, then at about 8:00pm, I told daddy to call the midwife. She agreed to meet us at the birth center at 8:30pm, so we got all our things together pretty quickly. We arrived later than anticipated - I kept having to stop what I was doing for contractions! But finally, around 8:50pm, we showed up.
It was a beautiful, cool, January evening, with a fresh layer of snow outside.
I went right up to a birth room - the green one that daddy liked best - and stripped so they could check my dilation. I at 8cm, but you were still not in a great position.
The midwives had me lean over a birth ball on my knees so you would, hopefully turn, and I stayed like that for about an hour while daddy read index cards and prayed for me.
Then I asked if I could get in the shower. I put on my bikini top and got into the warm water where you FINALLY flipped around. After just 20 minutes or so, I told daddy I felt like I'd have to push soon and could he please tell the midwives?
The midwives started filling the birth tub with water while I dried off and climbed into the bed. They wanted to check my progress. I was pleased to hear that I was fully dilated, but still had some thinning to do. And my water still hadn't broken! They asked if I wanted them to break it and I said yes, so they tried... and tried... and tried! They said the membranes were really thick and it took about 10 minutes before they were able to get a hole in it. When my water broke, I was so relieved that there was no meconium!
Finally, I could climb into the tub. The hot water was a welcome relief. I sat on my knees and when a contraction hit, I told daddy, "This is going to be a big one!" I moaned and breathed through each contraction, willing myself to relax, while daddy continued to read the cards and pray.
And then, all of a sudden, I had to push. And after a couple pushes, your head was right there, crowning, but not out yet.
The midwives told me to sit back on my bottom, knees up, so I could push better. On the next push, your head was out, and your whole, perfect body slipped out with the next contraction and pushes.
At 10:55pm on Friday, January 25th, 2019 (your late Grandma Brenda's birthday) after 30 hours of labor and 7 minutes of pushing, you entered life on the outside, in a tub of warm water, in a quiet and calm room, as the moon and stars danced outside.
And then that quiet and calm was shattered.
As I held you in the tub, you would not stop crying. Your head was arched back and you could not calm down. With help, we moved to the bed where I was examined (no tearing!) and tried to encourage you to nurse, but you didn't even want to root around, much less suckle. The midwives examined you - a 9 on your APGAR - and noticed that your spine seemed out of alignment, especially near your sacrum. And still you cried. Nothing would calm you.
Finally, they grabbed some frankincense essential oils and rubbed it down your back. That helped long relax your "little" body (9lbs, 4 oz and 21 inches long!) and finally, you latched on for nursing. We were encouraged to see a chiropractor for your back, so an appointment was made for that day at 6:00pm.
By about 2:00am, I had showered and changed into a robe, daddy was snuggling you next to me in bed, and we were snacking on some foods we'd brought from home. We slept until about 6:00am, when we loaded everything back into the Jeep and drove home, stopping for coffee and McDonald's breakfast on the way.
Hudson James, named for the missionary Hudson Taylor and the Biblical book of James, you came in like a storm. Your birth kicked off an anxious two months as we tried to balance doctors appointments, post-partum infections, breastfeeding struggles, and illness. But your birth brought such joy to our hearts.
Our sweet Hudson - the biggest of all three babies, the longest of all three labors... the Lord has big plans for you, and I'm so thankful to be the mama helping guide you in those plans.
Love love love,
Mama
